Iambic Petometer
Recent Notice from Town Attorney:
New town law: Residents can have a maximum of two licensed dogs, two cats, and two small, fur-bearing animals per dwelling unit, so long as they do not create a nuisance to neighboring properties.
Ye Gads! I'm thrust into a quandary.
I’m barren of dogs, but cats? I have three.
None of noble pedigree for show,
But each is precious, which one must go?
Not Little Boy, in Lone Ranger mask,
Who in his youth a master mouser pranced
Through living room, proud, bushy tail unfurled
Bib, collar, high-stepping white boots awhirl
To bathtub to toy with terrified mouse
'Til rescued prey freed near neighboring house
Now, long retired, he prefers my warm lap
Trading me snores in luxurious nap
What, forfeit him to some inane quota?
No chance, Little Boy, not an iota!
And what of sweet Sugar, white as the snow
From which she was rescued, shivering so?
A prettier creature eyes never saw
Wetting and polishing whisker and paw.
So skittish and spooked when she came to us
Yet now each morning insists on a fuss
Mounting my lap, amid coffee and news
I comb and praise away thoughts of abuse
Purring, that ivory bundle of hair
Bolts to curl up on my computer chair
Until I bump her into bureau drawer,
Then tap the keys to her comforting snore
No, it can’t be Sugar, she’s earned her stay.
Neither town nor court can send her away.
Focusing now on mischievous female
Little Sister, she of question mark tail
Who gallops at meal time dish to dish
Nosing her way into siblings' chopped fish
Brown and grey tabby on mission to see
What new, devilish way to aggravate me
Lord knows I try to make peace with that cat
But scornful paw swats away each friendly pat
A candidate for castoff, might say you,
But should I oust her, the wife will leave, too.
Oh, how Little Sister adores my mate
Stays near for cuddles no matter how late.
Leaping to lap with kittenish squeaks
Nuzzling and bumping her nose, ears and cheeks.
Each time the wife coughs, though Sister's asleep,
She wakes with a worried God Bless You bleat.
Having won the endless love of my wife.
Little Sister stays while I still breathe life
No vote of Town Board splits my family
Of people, cats and, yes, small things furry
I place my faith in the ancient precept
Some existing things outlawed may be kept
These cats are grandfathered in while alive
Thus, legally speaking, I can have five